Dating - As a Pornographer and as a Vegetarian

I sometimes wonder which is worse when I go out on dates; telling my date that I routinely shoot other guys naked in my apartment or telling them that I don't eat meat. One is sometimes worse than the other.

I'm on Peta's phone mail tree. So, every now and then I get a phone call saying, "Hey, come to this demo, the circus is in town." or a fur protest or something. For Mother's Day, there was an anti-veal demo in Union Square around noon. A guy asked me out on a date at one, right nearby. Great, I thought, I'd hang out at the anti-veal demo for a little bit, then meet my date.

The activists had a wooden veal crate all set up in the middle of the sidewalk, and a video playing. It was perfect - we were able to educate a lot of people about veal. I passed out some flyers. I was running late and stuck the rest in my gym bag.

We sit down at an Italian restaurant and what does he order? Veal scaloppini. I didn't say anything, me and my penne primavera with marinara sause - and the flyers sticking out of my bag, we kept quiet.

But then he continued, he was also on Atkins. And told me about the wondrous virtues of a meaty meat diet. I still had not told him that I was a vegetarian, and I never did. The date was so over. If only he was cuter...

Then there was another guy, a few years younger than me, worked in computers, got his maters, but lost his corporate job and in his late twenties went back home to Brooklyn to live with his parents. Fine. He was cute.

Then he started talking about how he was not interested in working in the corporate world again. OK, I thought. He wanted to get a job on the floor at Circuit City.

I'm so fucking polite sometimes, and I said, "well, that's a good idea, it'll be a good change of pace."

Then, I told him that I make porn.

Yes, I interview the models.

Yes, they get naked.

Yes, I take videos of them...

"Um, I'm sorry, I don't really feel comfortable dating someone who makes porn."

What? You fucking loser!!! You live with your parents and you ASPIRE to work the floor of Circuit City and YOU don't want to date ME, a successful entrepreneur.

Go fuck yourself!!

You see why I'm so bitter....